Manny the Miracle Worker

RAY: A few weeks ago an elderly woman customer came into the garage with a huge '85 Lincoln Town Car. One of these cars that should be accorded nationhood and have a seat in the UN General Assembly. Anyway, she's talking to Manny, the youngest of our technicians, and she's explaining to him what she wants done with her car. And, of course, I'm eavesdropping.

She says, 'There are two things that need to be looked at. One of them is that I need a tune up because my mileage has been off and the engine seems to be laboring, like the power's diminished. And my shift indicator is off. When I'm in park, it really says I'm in reverse. And when I'm in drive, it really says, I'm in two.'

Manny says, "Aha! I know what's wrong with your car. You're not in the right gear, and you're in second gear and that's why your mileage is off and that's why the engine seems to be laboring."

"Au contraire, little piston-puss," says the old lady. "I can feel all the shifts. I start driving, and it shifts from first to second and then it shifts from second to third, and then if I stomp on the gas, it down shifts."

"So how do you know the mileage is off?" asks Manny.

"Every month I take a trip to visit my mother-in-law in New Hampshire," she says. "I noticed on my return trip the last time that when I got back the thing seemed to be laboring. My mileage was terrible for the whole return trip, and I began to notice all these symptoms."

He asks her a bunch of other irrelevant questions like what color blue is your hair anyway, and then he asks her where in New Hampshire does her mother-in-law live?

"She lives in North Crunchy Granola, New Hampshire."

And he then asks if the mother-in-law lives on a dirt road? And she says, "Why, as a matter of fact, she does. And it's a lousy dirt road with pot holes and I hate driving there."

And he says to her, 'I know what's wrong with your car. You don't need a tune up. And one repair is going to fix everything-the drop in mileage, the poor performance and whole shebang.'

What did he learn from this last question that enabled him to figure out what was wrong with her car? Now, mind you. He hadn't seen the car, of course. It was parked outside.

Think you know? Drop Ray a note!

[ Car Talk Puzzler ]